THE AFTERLIFE BOUTIQUE

by Joanne Giannino

April May 2002

 

Once upon a time and somewhere over the rainbow…

J:            (flopping onto the set) Well, that was interesting. I was, there, and now I’m... I wonder where here is? Where am I? Anyone else here? Hello???

S:         Oh, hello. Welcome to the Otherside and the Afterlife Boutique.

J:          The otherside? Like the movie, the Other Side of Midnight?

S:         (very seriously) Oh, no. The otherside, honey. You’ve passed over. You’re dead.

J:          (in disbelief) No. (settling in) No. (with interest) Really?

S:         Yes.

J:          Cool. I’ve wondered a little about what it would be like. (looking around) Never really had this in mind.

S:         Well then. (shrugs…) Let’s move along. What are you?

J:          What do you mean, what am I? I’m a woman…

S:         Yes, I see that deary. I mean, what are you? Jewish? Catholic? Muslim? Hindu?

J:          Oh, it matters?

S:         Oh, yes. Of course it matters. It matters what you believe.

J:          (to the audience) Of course, Sophia Fahs said that didn’t she. OK, I’m a UU…

S:         A what?

J:          A Unitarian Universalist.

S:         (looks at first page on her notepad) I don’t see that here, must, ah, be a new one…

J:          Oh, no, not new. Actually we can trace our origins back to the first Christians who believed in the unity of God.

 

S:            Really… a direct link?

 

J:          No more an emerging consciousness. The first documented mention of the term Unitarian comes later during the Protestant Reformation, after Calvin and Luther…

 

S:         Oh, quite a scholar huh?

 

J:          No, just a DREs daughter.

 

S:          Whatever. So, you’re probably here under Christians, not orthodox, but Protestants? (flips another page) Here you are. Well then. I see you are quite diverse group, sort of picking and choosing.

 

J:          Well it’s a little more complicated than that. We each take a responsible search for truth and meaning.

 

S:         OK. Well, this is a great teachable moment, but we really need to be moving along deary. Time to choose.

 

J:          Time to choose what?

 

S:         Your afterlife of course. This is the Afterlife Boutique. First stop on your afterlife journey. And I’m here to help you choose, or have you already given it some thought?

 

J:          Well, ya know, I’ve spent most of my time living in the moment. I’m a real one-day at a time girl.

 

S:         Of course. Why don’t I go over the choices then? They all sit here on these dusty old shelves. Jars of beliefs about life and death, various faith traditions. Since you are a UU, let’s go over them so you can make a reasoned choice.

 

J:          Yes, thank you.

 

S:         So, you are not really Christian. Let’s start with these over here. (pulling a jar off the shelf) Islam: omnipotent and merciful God, called Allah, six fundamental beliefs, revealed by the prophet Mohammed, acknowledges other prophets like Jesus, Moses, etc., requires five actions, called Pillars, daily prayer, fasting, charity, a pilgrimage to Mecca, and the recitation of a creed. Afterlife destinations? Heaven or Hell based on atonement of sins or not, and above requirements met. Sound like you?

 

J:          No. I think that would have been really clear. (rolls her eyes) UU.

 

S:         OK, then. (another jar) Hinduism: oldest world religion though no single founder, theological system, or central organization, one Supreme God with many deities, though based on principle that all reality is unity. At death, one’s soul transmigrates into another body to work out karma, eventually leading to higher levels of consciousness, bad deeds lead to rebirth at lower level or even as an animal. A good life meets four aims including gratification of the senses including sensual, sexual and mental joy, cool. Hinduism is tolerant of other faiths. Sound like you?

 

J:          Well, I like pieces of it, but no it’s not how I’ve lived my life so, not my afterlife.

 

S:         OK, oh, this one is probably closer, since Christianity arose out of Judaism: People are seen as basically good and find their rewards and punishments while on earth, here and now, by participating in a covenant with their G*d. Focus in on actions rather than beliefs. There are various afterlife scenarios including, more choices, resurrection, heaven, hell or reincarnation. You?

 

J:          I like the part about focusing on actions not just beliefs. Walking the talk, I guess. But, no, not me.

 

S:         Well here’s an interesting one that’s been making a comeback lately, Paganism: Death is part of a circle. The dead exist on another plane and can be contacted at special times of the year. Reincarnation for pagans means becoming part of the earth, like the faded leaves and becoming fertilizer, or coming back in another life form – human or animal – no judgement either way. Reward or punishment is based on the three-fold rule: do good, good comes back three times, do bad, bad comes back three times. Interested?

J:          They are all interesting, but not me…. I’m feeling a little left out right now. Maybe I just don’t fit it.

 

S:         Don’t get discouraged deary. Seems to me, I have been around a few millennia now, that most of them have a pretty common theme. Follow the rules and win your reward. Or else you must face the consequences. Now or later.

 

J:          Yeah, but Unitarian Universalists tend to believe in good works for goodness’ sake and not in a reward later. More like enjoying this life and making a contribution and becoming part of a living memory that lives on in others that follow. Or that simply your actions live on for you. Or really it’s up to each of us to figure it out on our own and respect the spiritual journey that each of us takes toward truth and service.

 

S:         Wow, sounds like a lot of work.

 

J:          Yeah, but it’s also very interesting and satisfying.

 

S:         OK, then let’s go back to your heritage, (pick up another bottle and read) Christianity: Thirty-three percent of the world are followers of Jesus of Nazareth with a basic belief in a trinity, father, son and holy spirit, the Protestant Reformation split the church, now fragmented into thousands of individual denominations and groups of denominations. Afterlife choices: only those who are saved by taking Jesus as their Lord and Savior go to heaven; salvation from God through church sacraments (like baptism) and agreeing to a creed, most go to Purgatory – a sort of waiting place until you are cleared – only a few go directly to heaven, all others go permanently to hell (harsh); the liberals interpret hell symbolically and believe a loving God will admit all to heaven.

 

J:          That last one sounds familiar. I remember that the early Universalists believed that God is Love and all would be saved. But I am a Unitarian Universalist in the year 2002. Don't you have a UU afterlife choice?

 

S:         Well, there must be one here somewhere (search among bottles). Not in the Protestants, really. Oh, look, here you are in the Non-Christian Western. Unitarian Universalist: Unlike any other religion! You can say that again. Quite diverse, humanists, earth-centered folks, theists, atheists, agnostics, scientists…mystics, and more. Held together not by a shared theological system but shared values and principles (there are seven principles though they are not a creed), acceptance, respect and support of each other as individuals, a desire to take religious questions seriously and a commitment to social justice and public witness. Wow, pretty impressive. Is that you honey?

 

J:          Yes, yes. (elated) Finally a place that fits me.

 

S:         There’s more. (read more) Various views on life after death, including complete annihilation of the person, some form of afterlife removed from earth, or reincarnation. And, here’s one you might be interested in; no one knows what happens after death.

 

J:          Is there an option for that one? An afterlife that says we don’t know?

 

S:         Oh, yes, if there’s a bottle, it’s an option. Would you like this one?

 

J:          Yes, I think I would like to keep that question open. No one knows what tomorrow will bring anymore than what death will bring. Isn’t it just another day, albeit a big day?

 

S:         Well if that’s what you believe.

 

J:          Yes, I think it is.

 

S:         Well then, here you go, take the bottle and walk this way. Have a great adventure.

 

J:            Thanks. I’ve enjoyed meeting you. Have a great adventure yourself.

 

Both:            Goodbye, Goodbye.

 

The end